See the comment below on Why David Believed that Uriah Was A Rebel Against the Kingdom?
Why David Believed that Uriah Was A Rebel Against the Kingdom?
II Shmuel/Samuel 11:11 states: Uriah answered David, “The Ark and Israel and Judah are located at Succoth, and my master Joab and Your Majesty’s men are camped in the open; how can I go home and eat and drink and sleep with my wife? As you live, by your very life, I will not do this!”
Rashi to tractate Shabbat 56a held that the act David considered to be rebelliousness, was the fact that he called Yoav/Joab his master in the presence of King David. Yoav/Joab was under the command of King David and it was not the way of the land to give such honor to a subordinate in the presence of the King.
Tosafot brings the opinion of Rabbeinu Meir, that the rebellion was Uriah’s refusal to listen to King David who had told Uriah to go home to eat and drink and sleep with his wife.
Most commentaries follow Rashi’s viewpoint. Menachem Gottlieb in his talk about “Refusing Orders” follows Tosafot.